Unattainable Addiction

I can't keep up with my television shows. Now I know this shouldn't be so important in the scheme of things. But it seems that the more stress in my life, the bigger my need is for a medical/legal/island drama or a reality singing or dancing show.

It gets even more complicated by the fact that I'm a linear person, and need to watch every episode of, say, "Grey's Anatomy" in order. So if I miss one, I get all confused and resentful. And abc.com only keeps the last five episodes or so on line, so if I wait too long, all is lost.

Speaking of "Lost," gracious! One can't miss a moment of this one, let alone an entire episode. Otherwise: What decade are we in now? Who's alive? Who hasn't been born yet? Who's Aaron's mom now? Is Ben all-powerful or a wuss in this one? Which ones have actually met Jacob? Have they explained yet about the polar bears??? I have managed to watch this show faithfully since its inception, but with the new baby and all, the final season has gotten away from me. I'll have to actually break down and spend money on iTunes to see this one. With all of my free time. Sigh.

And it's also a problem that I happen to like my husband, and respect the fact that he likes many of the same shows (though thankfully he despises "Lost"). So if he's out at a late meeting or at Masons, I'm faced with the quandary: Do I watch "Parenthood" without him? Then he'll be behind. And I'll either have to watch it again or leave him forever in the dark. He's a good sport about it, but one doesn't like to watch one's spouse suffer quietly...

And it doesn't help that everyone and their brother who I went to school with grew up and became famous. So of course I have to watch THEIR shows. "Damages," "In Plain Sight," "Weeds," every other episode of all the various "Law & Order"s; I got people in all of 'em. Even "Baywatch." (But thankfully I've restrained myself there.) And forget about all those sweet talented people that I did musicals with in high school that became mega-movie stars. A girl can't keep up. I'll rent their movies in 2015 when the baby goes to Kindergarten.

I hear you suggesting that I forget the whole thing and throw the TV out the window. Worth considering... Okay I considered it. Nope. Need to see who wins on "Idol." Need to get my fix of brain-numbing-screen-watching after the kids are finally asleep and all 147 items of laundry are folded and put away.

And if I don't keep up with "Glee," my Facebook friends will never speak to me again. Can't have that.